Break out of man-made time...

Nityo Nityaanam, Chetanas Chetanaanaam
Katha Upanishad 2-2-13
"The timeless midst the transient, the awareness amidst the flux"
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Join back the little slivers of time that you have unwittingly split up with your own hands. Regain a continuing sense of the present. The so called 'present moment' isn't here now and gone the next instant. Flow with nature and discover for yourself if your 'present moment' can continue longer, through the hour, through the day. Allow that little fleeting instant to stretch out. Rejoin the fragments of your life that have been broken into little manageable bits of '10 AM, meeting with boss', '10.15 AM, meeting with client'.
***
Have a 'whole day meeting with self" - no boss, no client, no computer, nothing to tell what time it is. Remove the scheduler, the task manager, the wrist watch, the little digital dial with its virtual ticks marking out an irreversible, irredeemable slice of your life that was here now this instant and gone forever the next. Reset your life, gain freedom from gadgets that have cut up your conception of time into little pieces. Let man made, machine made time fly out finally and completely, never to return again, at least not with the same manic force and strength.
***
Ancient man measured time by the moon and seasons. For him time was something completely different from what it is now. You can call him primitive, call him out dated, but remember this - his present moment lasted much longer, he was more at peace, more in sync with the universe than we can ever be. Try and flow with rhythms of nature that our ancestors understood so well, and which no longer make sense to our chopped up world. There is time marked by day and night, a full twelve hours each - something you will understand only if you find yourself in a silent remote place with nothing to do except watch the sun rise and set, watch the stars wheel around and fade, and watch the sun rise again.
***
There is time marked by phases of the moon, lasting twenty eight days froma full moon to a full moon. There is time marked by rhythms of seasons, and if you can ever learn to mark your time by this you will be a completely different person for the rest of your days. There are also rhythms beyond the solstice, almost beyond the ken of human grasp. There are visitations of comets, like Halley, which returns every 72 years. The human life span isn't long enought to mark time by this. Then there are longer rhythms way beyond human reference. There is the coming and going of the ice age, for instance, and even longer rhythms beyond the grasp of science.
***
All time is, in a sense, mind. Understand this and change forever. The 'present moment' is the mind playing its little management game on you. Because the so called 'present' needn't be a moment at all, it could be an hour, a day or the rest of forever. The faster time flows, the more restles your mind is, and the smaller your 'moment' is. Soon a point is reached where the mind is so frayed by whirling events that the present 'moment' has gone completely.
***
Life is then a daze where events are happening in a blur and there is no grasp of the now. Conversely, when you flow in deep meditation, time seems to stop completely. When you contemplate a verse from the Vedanta, the everyday mind fades away and deeper mind surfaces, bringing with it a different fare slower sense of time.
***
If we choose to, all can always become now. If you can slip out of the clutches of man made time, and slip into the rhythms of time as nature made it out to be, you sense a deep expansion of the present moment. Understanding time completely means reaching a point of stillness where time disappears. At that point, the mind also disappears. Suddenly the Vedantic truth hits home. There is a part of us which is timeless. A part of us which caqn never be ravaged by time. Seek that timelessness amidst the transience. Feel that stillness in the storm....

Spirituality is not a shield to seek cover, but an aid to life......PAVAN CHOUDARY

CONFLICT SITUATIONS CANNOT BE RESOLVED WITH BLIND FAITH ALONE. INSTEAD, LEARN TO TACKLE YOUR INNER AND OUTER BATTLES HEAD-ON...

Something that has never undergone any change over a thousand years of man's evolution is human nature. The positive and negative traits of human beings have stayed the same.
***
We still fight among each other, we are hungry for power and we fall prey to envy. But then, our spiritual nature has also not faded away. We still feel the need to connect to a higher power, as much as we did then, if not more. And spirituality is even more relevant today in a world that has been plagued by problems of a new kind - global warming, terrorism etc.
***
Today's world requires an approach to problem solving that does not use spirituality as a shield. As a nation, we committed that mistake several hundred years ago. When the first set of invaders came to conquer us, our rulers chose to seek shelter in spiritualism. They assumed God would protect them when they were faced with marauding armies. But that did not happen. Instead, we were shackled in bondage by centuries of conquerors, choosing to plunder us time and again.
***
This is where the principles of Chanakya, Kabir and Confucius come into play. Chanakya was very clear about his idea of statecraft. Any nation embarking on a blind pursuit of spirituality would end up in chaos and slavery.
***
And Chanakya was aware of this truth. He advocated for balance - socially, politically, economically and spiritually. You cannot count on religion when a nation is being invaded. That specifically calls for military might. Even our scriptures like the Bhagavad Gita provide golden examples of how warriors are faced with predicaments when their human emotions come into conflict with their karma. But one has to fight his or her battles.
***
On the other end, Kabir has a simple philosophy for life. For him spirituality was all about being compassionate. Anything apart from that was just misguided spiritualism.
***
On a similar note, Confucius vouched for a system that proposed a gentle but firm approach to human relations, which considered the fallible nature of man.
***
Having said that, spirituality is an essential nutrient for the human soul, without which man would be incomplete. Along with fulfilling one's humanly duties, one must take time out to connect with the spiritual being. It's the nectar that keeps humans ticking beyond time.
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Hotel Hijinx

A man in a hotel lobby accidentally bumps a woman in the breast with his elbow. Quite apologetic, he turns to her and says "If your heart is as soft as your breast, you will surely forgive me." She leans up to him and whispers "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 1221."

Solitary Confinement Woes

Three guys are convicted of

a very serious crime, and they're all sentenced to twenty years in solitary confinement.

They're each allowed one thing to bring into the cell with them. The first guy asks for a big stack of books. The second guy asks for his wife. And the third guy asks for two hundred cartons of cigarettes.

At the end of the twenty years, they open up the first guy's cell. He comes out and says, "I studied so hard. I'm so bright now, I could be a lawyer. It was terrific."

They open up the second guy's door. He comes out with his wife, and they've got five new kids. He says. "It was the greatest thing of my life. My wife and I have never been so close. I have a beautiful new family. I love it."

They open up the third guy's door, and he's slapping at his pockets, going "Anybody got a match?"

Take Off My Clothes

My wife came home the other night and told me to take off her blouse.

Then she told me to take off her skirt.

Then she told me not to wear her clothes anymore.

What do you get when you divide ...

What do you get when you divide the circumference of your jack-o-lantern by its diameter?

Pumpkin Pi!

Ode to the Perfect Man

The perfect man is gentle
And never cruel or mean.
He has a perfect smile
And is always neat and clean.

The perfect man likes kids
And will raise them by your side.
He will be a caring father,
And good husband to his bride.

The perfect man loves cooking.
He will clean and vacuum, too.
He'll do what's in his power
To show his love for you.

The perfect man is sweet,
Writing poems with your name.
He's a best friend to your mother
And will kiss away your pain.

He never makes you cry
Nor caused you hurt in any way.
To hell with this endless poem --
The perfect man is gay.

Men vs. Women: Round 1

NICKNAMES

If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose.

If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.

EATING OUT

When the bill arrives, Mike, Charlie, Bob and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back.

When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want.

BATHROOMS

A man has six items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn.

The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

ARGUMENTS

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

CATS

Women love cats.

Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

FUTURE

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

DRESSING UP

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Any married man should forget his mistakes.

There's no use in two people remembering the same thing

Man, Woman, Sleeping Compartment

A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train.

After the initial embarrassment they both go to sleep, the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower.

In the middle of the night the woman leans over, wakes the man and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket."

The man leans out and, with a glint in his eye, says, "I've got a better idea... just for tonight, let's pretend we're married."

The woman thinks for a moment. "Why not," she giggles.

"Great," he replies, "Get your own damn blanket!"

And Then God Created Brunettes

Q: Why did God make brunettes?
A: So the ugly men have a chance

Men Are Like...

"Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with."

Women's English

"Yes" = No

"No"= Yes

"Maybe" = No

"I'm sorry" = You'll be sorry

"We need" = I want

"It's your decision" = The correct decision should be obvious by now

"Sure... go ahead" = I don't want you to

"I'm not upset" = Of course I'm upset, you moron!

"We need to talk" = I need to complain

"You're certainly attentive tonight" = Is sex all you ever think about?

"Be romantic, turn out the lights" = I have flabby thighs

"This kitchen is so inconvenient" = I want a new house

"I want new curtains" = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper...

"I heard a noise" = I noticed you were almost asleep

"Do you love me?" = I'm going to ask for something expensive

"How much do you love me?" = I did something today you're really not going to like

"I'll be ready in a minute" = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.

"Is my butt fat?" = Lie to me

"You have to learn to communicate" = Just agree with me

"Are you listening to me!?" = [Too late, you're dead]

"Do what you want." = You'll pay for this later

Men & Women Of Chemistry

Element Name: MAN

Symbol: XY

Atomic

Weight: (180 +/- 50)

Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.

Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with Kd (Element: Child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize by dousing with alcohol.

Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to produce large quantities on command.

Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.

---

Element Name: WOMAN
Symbol: WO
Atomic Weight: (don't even go there!)

Physical properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze any time. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if not used well.

Chemical properties: Very active. Often unstable. Possesses strong affinity for gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a better specimen.

Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.

Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.

Skin Transplant Surgery

A married couple was

in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.

The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!

One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice.

She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."

"My darling," he replied, "think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."

Difference Between Men and Women

1. A man will

pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want.

2. A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

3. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

4. To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot & love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot & not try to understand her at all.

5. Married men live longer than single men - but married men are a lot more willing to die.

6. Any married man should forget his mistakes - there's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

7. Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

8. A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change & she does.

9. A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

10. There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before marriage & after marriage.

12- Pack

A father and his son go into the grocery store when they happen upon the condom aisle. The son asks his father why there are so many different boxes of condoms. The father replies, ''Well, you see that 3-pack? That's for when you're in high school. You have 2 for Friday night and 1 for Saturday night.''

The son then asks his father, ''What's the 6-pack for?''

The father replies, ''Well, that's for when you're in college. You have 2 for Friday night, 2 for Saturday night, and 2 for Sunday morning.''

Then the son asks his father what the 12-pack is for.

The father replies, ''Well, that's for when you're married. You have one for January, one for February, one for March, one for.....''

Sex Math 101

What kind of math don't they teach in school?

How to add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs, and multiply!

A Husband's Moment of Realization

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"

"What dear?" She asked gently.

"I think you bring me bad luck."

Let The Rose Grown Within You

Once a man planted a rose plant and watered it regularly. One day, he saw a bud appearing on the plant. Suddenly he felt that the bud cannot blossom into a beautiful flower as the plant is infested with thorns all over. He was so saddened and despaired that he stopped watering the plant. Soon it died.
***
The simple tale has a lot to do with us. Very few of us realise that there is a rose within us. The God-like sweet qualities are implanted in our hearts when we are born. They grow amid the thorns of our faults. When we look at ourselves and others we see only faults beyond mending. We despair, thinking that nothing good can possibly be found in and around us. We totally neglect or fail to find the hidden goodness in us and we never realize our own latent potential to improve and change ourselves.
***
Sometimes we need someone else to show what we are. One of the greatest gifts we possess is our ability to overcome the thorns within us and find our own good 'self'. This is the chief characteristic of love, which helps us look at the persons, knowing their faults, recognise their nobility and help them to overcome their faults. If we show them the rose, they can conquer the thorns. Hence it is our duty to help others by showing their roses and not merely their thorns. Only then it is possible to develop Harmony among people around us....

Old King Who Wanted To Becom Young

There was once an intelligent but greedy King. Though he had done much for the betterment of the people, he was selfish in his desires.

***

As years passed, the King grew old and lost his physical strength. He had a strong desire that he should become young once again. He was prepared to offer half the kingdom to any person who can make him young by any means. He called the minister and said, "Go in search of someone who can give formula or medicine to make me young once again".
***
The minister was amused. He knew that birth, groth, decay and death are natural. But he had to carry out the order of the king. The minister, with a group of soldiers, went in search of a person who could make the king young. He went through villages, towns and even forests. Some people laughed at the idea, some kept quiet out of fear and some felt that the king might have become mentally unsound.
***
As the minister was going through a forest, he came across a sait doing penance under a banyan tree. His face was radiating divine light and grace. After some time the saint opened his eyes and observed the minister standing in front of him. With a smiling gesture, he questioned him the purpose of his visit.
***
The minister with all humility touched the feet of the holyman and explained, "Respected holyman, our king is keen to regain his lost youth. I request you to make him young with your powers".
***
The saint softly laughed. After thinking for a minute he said in a very pleasant voice, "With the grace of God and with the power I have acquired through long penance I can make your king young once again. But on one condition".
***
The minister was surprised at the unexpected assurance given by the holyman. With all earnestness he bowed and said prayerfully, "King holyman, I am happy to know that my king's desire would be fulfilled. He will cooperate in every respect. He is even prepared to offer half the kingdom to anyone who can make him young. Kindly tell me what is to be done by my king".
***
The saint smiled once again and replied, "What can I do with the kingdom? I am a saint living in that small hut spending time in prayers. I have no expectation. But I will give you a medicine. Every day your king should stand before a mirror and apply the medicine on his face. While applying the medicine, he should not think of a monkey. If this condition is fulfilled, within a week's time young king will become young once again".
***
The minister was over joyed and said, "Swamiji, this is a very simple condition. My king will definately follow your instructions and receive your blessings".
***
With the belssings of the saint, the minister carried the medicine to the king. To the great delight of the king he narrated how the saint was kind enough to give the medicine ona simple condition.
***
The king very much pleased. He ordered the minister to announce a week's festivities throughout the kingdom hoping that he would become young once again.
***
The king started using the medicine. The moment he took the medicine to apply on his face, he thought of a monkey. He tried his best not to think of a monkey. But he was unable to drive away the image of monkey from his mind.
***
At last he became desparate and threw away the medicine. He realised that it was impossible for him to use the medicine without thinking of a monkey. He understood that the saint made him wise that youth once lost cannot be regained. He also learnt that the age is to the mind but not to the body... Moral...:-- The most difficult thing in life is to control one's mind...
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Men Of Achievement__Swamy Chinmayananda

The real men of achievement are people who have the heroism to fuel more and more enthusiasm in their work when they face more and more difficulties.___Swami Chinmayananda...

Always Be Positive...Swami Chidananda

One of the favorite sayings of Gurudeve, which he wrote in his writings as well as quoted in his divine talks was, "NEVER DESPAIR. NEVER DESPAIR. NIL DESPERANDUM". A poet once said, "Hope springs in the human breast. Heart within, God overhead". Another poet said, "Tell me not in mournful numbers - life is but an empty dream!" You have come here to strive and attain. Strive on. Do purushartha. Be strong. Be determined and plod on. If thus you do purushartha, you will get help from God. That is the one meaning of 'Heart within and God overhead!" Do exert on and then help will come from God. There are two ways of approaching life. One is diffidence, lack of confidence, negativity: "I don't think I can do it. It is too difficult". Another way is : "I can. I will try my best". "I can't" is not rational. It is irrational. And if after trying your very best, you do not succeed in attaining the objective, I can assure you, you have not failed. Success may not be yours, but you have succeeded. You have fulfilled a human being's duty.
***
God is all that is positive, all that is auspicious, good and beautiful. There is no negativity in God. And you are made in His image. You have potential for all that is positive and positive only. You should not belie your divine nature. At every step, in all things, your life should prove your divine nature. It behoves you to always take a positive attitude towards life, and never a negative approach, to always have positive view of things, and to move forward in your daily life. Then your heart is in a state that the poet implied when he said, "Heart within and God overhead!"
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Good Sayings-46

901. Destiny has two ways of crushing us-by refusing our wishes and by fulfilling them.

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902. Truth is what prays in man, and a man is continually at prayer when he lives according to truth.
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903. Fear and love can never be experienced at the same time. It is always our choice as to which of these emotions we want.
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904. Peace is to be found only within and unless one finds it there he will never find it at all.
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905. Abundance can be had simply by consciously receiving what already has been given.
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906. Don't look for the path far away, the path exists under your feet.
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907. What is past and what cannot be prevented should not be grieved for.
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908. We promise according to our hopes and perform according to our fears.
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909. Life is short. Be swift to love! Make haste to be kind!
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910. Peace lies not in the external world. It lies within one's own soul.
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911. Peace rules the day where reason rules the mind.
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912. In the spiritual quest there are several roads, all of which lead to the one great end.
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913. Enter the inner chamber of your soul, shut out everything except God and that which can help you in seeking Him.
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914. If we would have peace and harmony in our environment, we must establish it within ourselves.
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915. We must reach out to a person, by listening and responding to him with the heart.
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916. All things which have a soul, change and possess in themselves more according to the law and to the order of destiny.
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917. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset.
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918. The soul needs more rest than the body and it could very well be that our restless soul is at the basis of many of our physical ills.
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919. Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man.
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920. Before receiving there must be giving.
*****

Good Sayings-45

881. Two things are necessary for the salvation of man: To know what he ought to desire and to know what he ought to do.
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882. You do not have to go out of the way to make God happy, you can make Him happy, but just doing the simplest things.
***
883. You must take life in your stride, let today embrace the past with remembrance and the future with longing.
***
884. Perfection only comes by a lot of practice and when you stick to what you are and try to be that perfectly.
***
885. God is one but He has countless names, you can worship Him in any way you want to, then you are sure to reach him.
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886. Spiritual work means the willingness to surrender feelings. It means we surrender to God our perceptions of all things.
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887. The spirit of man is more important than mere physical strength and the spiritual fibre of a nation than its wealth.
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888. An educated man is a man with certain spiritual qualities which make him calm in adversity.
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889. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom. It is the result of long and patient effort in self-control.
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890. Peace is a condition of mind brought about by the serenity of soul. Lasting peace can come only to peaceful people.
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891. God wishes that all living things be full of bliss, whether young or old, weak or strong, living or departed or yet unborn.
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892. Peace comes from loving, from mutual self-sacrifice and self-forgetfulness.
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893. Mankind must remember that peace is not God's gift to His creation; peace is our gift to each other.
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894. All things are connected. Whatever befalls the earth befalls the children of the earth.
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895. He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.
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896. Finish each day and be done with it. Tomorrow is a new day, begin it well and serenely and with a high spirit.
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897. Take up one thing and do it and see the end of it, and before you have seen the end, do not give up.
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898. Be patient and understanding. Life is too short to be vengeful and malicious.
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899. More tears are shed over answered prayers than unanswered ones.
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900. When everything is in its right place within us, we ourselves are in balance with the whole work of God.
*******