Monday 30 August 2010

Cyber Relationships Ruin Real Ones....

With more and more people turning to the online world for comfort, real relationships are being sidelined...........

Chatting, Pinging, Emailing, Twittering and texting - the cyber world is throwing newer forms of connecting with people, every other month.  Innovation, something that usually took years to develop, is now literally taking place with a snap of a finger.  While it is great for technological progress, is it really that great for relationships?
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Many being online interactions with no serious intent except to connect, have fun, network and 'be around" as they put it.  "If you aren't on Facebook you're pretty much an old hat and better relegate yourself to a tomb," say the with-it, who are always connected and available.  "What! You've got to be kidding, you don't know how to twitter?  Get a life babe/dude.  You'd rather have been born in the 16th century," is yet another common perception.  With comments like these, youngsters, who may not be web-savvy, are literally arm-twisted into being "connected'.  They fear that if they don't, they'd be looked upon as 'un-cool" and be the odd ones out.
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What starts off as a way to get familiar with people eventually turns into a dependence of sorts, with people freaking out if their Internet connections are down for even a few hours.  It slowly veers into personal space where couples who usually "communicated" inter-personally, now prefer to sit silently next to each other, busy with his/her laptop "communicating" with an unknown stranger.
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Often, the ramifications on relationships aren't too evident.  Over time however, it eats into special time and before one knows it, one has transgressed into an emotional connect with an online person who "listens", makes no judgments, completely accepts you for what you are and allows you to vent.  Since virtual buddies don't live with each other, it makes it easier for them, to be more accepting, accommodating, tolerant and less complaining about peculiarities.  In this safe haven of anonymity and total approval, people don't even realise how and when they slip into an emotional attachment with a stranger.
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This new age phenomenon of emotional connections in the virtual world is here to stay.  But we have to safeguard ourselves from falling into trap, that to an undiscerning eye, shows no evident threat.  It is a hazard so severe that, if not taken care of, could spiral into something that you can't control.
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As simple as it may sound, developing a solid relationship with your significant other decreases the probability of "online infidelity".  A unifying bond between you two, and putting your faith in similar ideas of loyalty may help you draw boundaries and around what is acceptable and what is not - in both the virtual world or in reality.
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Keeping each other in the loop about to who you connect with and who you interact with on various sites, could be another method to keep a check on yourself.
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Those who swear by the concept of "individuality" would exclaim, "Are we supposed to share everything about our lives with our partners..."  But isn't it a healthier method to share everything with each other, so that you don't fall prey to temptation?  If your intentions are clear, what's there to hide, right?...............
      ..........THE WRITER IS A PSYCHOLOGIST WITH LILAVATI HOSPITAL, MUMBAI..............

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